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feeling: dirty hearing: the grey album
larp on my mule.
keep it going. get it moving. keep it going. get it moving.
i will not be defeated so easily.
girls try and fuck with my head, i push on.
feeling empty and heavy, i push on.
i try to reserve judgement, and act upon instinct, in all situations...
maybe people have come to predict that i will do nothing in a lot of situations where a normal person would react quickly...
change it up.
make things different, change your mind.
i don't know what is going on anywhere else but inside my head...
one girl has, once again, failed to impress me.
another girl has me poised to fall, given the perfect moment.
another girl still is mu.
hearing some spiritualized today brought back memories of losing yet another girl.
man, whether i'm catching glimpses of the perfection behind their eyes with subtle sidelong glances or keeping to myself and waiting patiently for the chance to bail, women screw me up...
in good ways and bad ways.
but it doesn't take a girlfriend to make me realize what i have now...
and it doesn't take a girlfriend for me to be the first one outside when it snows trying to catch a few flakes on my tongue, eyes to the sky...
but it's fun to do it together.
i'll give anyone a chance to fail me...
sometimes it works out, sometimes, it's all fucked...
i'm tired, but i like where this is going. i'll take a shower and follow up on this later or sooner.
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be destroyed by yourself - 2005-05-30